J: Women's Week Special: My Curvy Body Image Warriors

Being the fat girl in the playground, the chubby high school student, and the voluptuous kolehiyala, I absolutely know a thing or two about how the public’s perception of "normal" can unnecessarily alter the character and self-esteem of a person. We have to be honest that subconsciously most people think that it is a little bit harder for fat people. And, that is where they’re wrong, because we have our own way of doing things, it may be a bit different from what the status quo considers normal, but that doesn’t mean that it is harder or wrong. Because of this so called “norm”, I became a child who always sought for the approval of others, that chubby high school student who always starved herself to be accepted and recognized in school. And that is never good nor healthy because we should not forget that what we see on the outside should never overpower the purity and the goodness we have inside. We should not change who we are to be accepted.

I did not overcome all of these struggles alone, I am very lucky to have very supportive parents who never failed to make me feel that I am loved. But sadly, when I was a teenage, that didn't just seem to be enough. I sought for something else which will validate me in a larger scale and that is when I found these role models. I hope that I can inspire you the same way they inspired me.

Stacy and Danah Gutierrez a.k.a Plumpinay, Bloggers

source: http://facebook.com/theplumpinay

The Plump Revolutionaries in the Philippines!

I never knew such revolution, if I may indulge, existed until I stumbled upon an article in a newspaper about these twin sisters blogging about plus size body love in the Philippines. I knew I’m going to love their blog immediately and I definitely did! Through them I have come to begin to love my body. It’s nice to have a role model, it’s nice to have someone to look for as an inspiration in a pool of model-esque, super fair, and super thin famous people in magazines and other forms of media. They have even launched a plus size swimwear with “I Love Koi”. They’re really ruling this positivity battle! They made me realize that it’s not about being thin or being fat, their cause is about being self-assured and being healthy. That acceptance and love is not just for what the society perceives as beautiful, women of all sizes and form deserve to be loved and accepted, flaws and all.


An inspiring poster made by Stacy Gutierrez:

source: www.plumpinay.com

Tess Munster, Plus Size Model

source: http://instagram.com/effyourbeautystandards

She is the founder of “effyourbeautystandards”; I guess no further explanation is needed for that! ;)

I found Tess Munster through the Plumpinay Facebook page and I am so glad that I did! She is doing what she loves to do, to model; it just so happened that she’s a curvy lady as well. And, that is what I really aim for, to be able to do what I love. And she doesn’t give any “eff” to what the status quo said that curvy women can and cannot wear or do. She defied all of them and she’s inspiring ladies all around the world while doing so. The point is no hindrance or no one should ever stop you from pursuing your dreams. And that, to me, is what Tess Munster embodies.

Adele, Grammy Award-Winning Singer

source: Google Images

 I know Adele as an incredible singer and an outspoken role model. She’s had her own share of ups and downs because of her weight *Ahem! Karl Lagerfeld! Ahem!* but she just shrugs it off and said this; 'I represent the majority of women and I'm very proud of that' and I do believe that that’s all there is to it, really. All of us have insecurities but don’t let a single negative comment backtrack everything that we have already achieved. And, besides she also said that she does music not for the eyes but for the ears and she is definitely nailing it in that area. Her voice is divine and that’s all that matters. Body size should never outshine talent.

Kat Dennings, Hollywood TV Comedienne (2 Broke Girls)

source: Google Images

Kat Dennings or Max from the hit TV show “2 Broke Girls” is very outspoken and proud of her curves. She’s very funny, witty and sultry. She’s not a size zero but she can look sultry and sexy just the way she is. Sexy is not measured by the dress a woman wears, sexiness is how a person feels inside and it will radiate in the eyes or body language, no matter if you’re skinny or fat. If you feel sexy inside, it will radiate on the outside, and that is what Kat Dennings is doing. Even her role in her series is very relatable. Her character, Max, is an average American woman leading a very colourful and not so easy life. She faces every struggle with wit and humour and she gets out of them each time. She may have never been categorized as skinny but she will always look sexy with that personality. And that is what every lady should realize, as long as you keep your body healthy, no matter what size you are, you can be sexy! Never ever starve yourself to lose weight or eat too much that it could already cause harm, everything should be done in moderation.

Jordin Sparks, American Idol Winner

source: Google Images

Jordin Sparks is a very talented singer and she just recently lost 50 lbs. within 18 months. It may seem drastic but she shared that her weight loss secret was putting priority on her health and not her jeans size. She also said that she never felt like she was suffering in eating less and exercising more, also she found an exercise she enjoys doing for her to stick to it. See, she never complained about her weight but she decided to lose it for herself and for her health. She really serves as an inspiration when she stepped out with her new body; she looked really good because she did it in a healthy and natural way. She inspires people in many ways, she mainly inspired me through her music with songs like “Faith” and “God loves ugly”, I am always lifted and these songs really hit me hard and really inspire me and put music to my soul.

Here are the songs: 

God loves ugly

“You said that I wasn't pretty,
So I just believed you
And you said that I wasn't special, so I lived that way
With critical gazes and brutal amazement
And how my reflection could be so imperfect
With all of my blemishes, how could somebody want me?
But God loves ugly
He doesn't see the way I see
Oh God takes ugly
And turns it into to something that is beautiful
Apparently I'm beautiful
Cause You love me”

Faith

“Cause when the sky's the darkest, you can see the stars.
And when you fall the hardest, you find how strong you are
Close your eyes, rest awhile, It’s been a long, long day
So come on, baby, baby,
Have A Little Faith ”

To wrap it all up, I guess the sole message that I want to send across here is that no matter what size we are in, the main point is that we stay healthy. Never starve our body, eat whenever we feel hungry and exercise enough to strengthen the body. Everyone is beautiful in our own way, and everyone should learn to accept and love whatever size or form they come in, because we must learn to love ourselves first, before we can give out love and receive love ;)

Keep healthy and always be kind to yourself!


-J

J: BEING NBSB (No Boyfriend Since Birth)

Well, what about being that NBSB girl?

Oh, how about that?! Being one, myself at 23, it gets kind of sad at times. (READ:  I hate to start on a depressing note right here, but believe me it will get better.) It makes me think of what have I been missing by not having a boyfriend, it also makes me think if I have already missed out on my chance to find the right guy. Hoping and sobbing while watching romantic movies because I still don’t know how that kind of love really feels like. Just sitting, wondering will I ever find one. That John Mayer song—“A Love Song for No One”, that is how it feels sometimes. The feeling of being left behind while almost all of my friends are being pursued by amazing, and sometimes not so amazing, guys and then on to having a relationship of their own makes me want to burst out to this song most of the time;

“I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk 
could I have missed my chance and watched you walk away?
I'm tired of being alone so hurry up and get here 
I'm so tired of being alone so hurry up and get here”

But then, this feisty woman inside me pulls me back to reality as I drift away to “pittyville” once more. And then I will just realize again how many girls my age would envy whatever I have right now. Just how many girls my age could say that they are so thrilled to know how it feels like to be pursued for the first time? Or how that first date feels like? Or how does a first kiss feel? That certain feeling of not knowing and the excitement of having something to look forward to, these are just some of the things I could still get a hold of to. And, I know I am not alone!

I know I am not the only one in this world who feels like a loser sometimes just because I or she still doesn’t have had any relationship yet at this age. Just realize that maybe we bloom a little later because we’re not supposed to have a BOYfriend, we are meant to have a MANfriend J I always say this to whomever is asking me why I still don’t have a boyfriend, and I don’t intend to offend anyone by saying this, “I don’t have a boyfriend because I am that one time big time girl”, and they will ask me what I meant and to which I will answer defiantly, “I am not the kind of girl who got to have tons of boyfriend to prove my femininity, I am the kind of girl that will be ready for the man I will spend the rest of my life with, wherever he is”

I wish my statements here wouldn’t be taken the wrong way, I really admire ladies my age that’s able to sustain a long-time relationship and I am so happy for all of you! But, just thinking of all the possibilities and adventures yet to unfold in my life, it’s just amazing!

Let me share a little story. Back in college it was my conscious decision to not be involved with anyone or even entertain any kind of woo-ing, that was a pact I made with myself, but I’m just a girl and I’ve had my own share of extreme crushes, platonic friendships and ultimate heartaches. Being heartbroken over a relationship that never really existed is the worst! And, I’ve been through all that. I was never and ever will be perfect, but I have embraced these imperfections and just accepted the fact that it is part of life. I have to be hurt every once in a while for me to be stronger, better and much more prepared for whatever life and love throws my way. I would not go into details; instead I will share how I got through it. And, it was never easy; it took time, sleepless night, bucket of tears and ample time of recharging my self-esteem.

Here it goes:

·         First, acknowledge that what I am trying to get over was never really there. That it was only me and I should be alright for myself.

·         Second, go through the pain, but never for too long.

·         Third, go out with friends and have fun.

·         This may sound cliché but the fourth step is to continue living. I might’ve gotten a haircut or something just to have another fresh beginning but other than that, all I did was, I continued to live. I moved on and nothing feels better than that J

So, to that guy who I am yet to meet in my life, I would just want to let you know that I am here still preparing myself to share my first hello, my first “can we have coffee sometime?”, my first date, my first ride home, my first love with you J I hope to cross paths with you when I am done being a girl and are already an independent lady. I will never lose faith of finding you or you finding me as soon as we both are ready to embark on this wonderful journey called LOVE.

Make everyday a day filled with love, life and laughter!

-J (020113/12:27AM)



P.S. May I suggest that you play this song by Jordin Sparks, it's called "Worth the Wait" and be inspired. This has been my anthem since college an it really helped me get through some stuff and a fool-proof feel good song. I am wishing it will do the same to you ;)