Well, what about being that NBSB girl?
Oh, how about that?! Being one, myself at 23, it gets kind of sad at times. (READ: I hate to start on a depressing note right here, but believe me it will get better.) It makes me think of what have I been missing by not having a boyfriend, it also makes me think if I have already missed out on my chance to find the right guy. Hoping and sobbing while watching romantic movies because I still don’t know how that kind of love really feels like. Just sitting, wondering will I ever find one. That John Mayer song—“A Love Song for No One”, that is how it feels sometimes. The feeling of being left behind while almost all of my friends are being pursued by amazing, and sometimes not so amazing, guys and then on to having a relationship of their own makes me want to burst out to this song most of the time;
“I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
could I have missed my chance and watched you walk away?
I'm tired of being alone so hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone so hurry up and get here”
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
could I have missed my chance and watched you walk away?
I'm tired of being alone so hurry up and get here
I'm so tired of being alone so hurry up and get here”
But then, this feisty woman inside me pulls me back to reality as I drift away to “pittyville” once more. And then I will just realize again how many girls my age would envy whatever I have right now. Just how many girls my age could say that they are so thrilled to know how it feels like to be pursued for the first time? Or how that first date feels like? Or how does a first kiss feel? That certain feeling of not knowing and the excitement of having something to look forward to, these are just some of the things I could still get a hold of to. And, I know I am not alone!
I know I am not the only one in this world who feels like a loser sometimes just because I or she still doesn’t have had any relationship yet at this age. Just realize that maybe we bloom a little later because we’re not supposed to have a BOYfriend, we are meant to have a MANfriend J I always say this to whomever is asking me why I still don’t have a boyfriend, and I don’t intend to offend anyone by saying this, “I don’t have a boyfriend because I am that one time big time girl”, and they will ask me what I meant and to which I will answer defiantly, “I am not the kind of girl who got to have tons of boyfriend to prove my femininity, I am the kind of girl that will be ready for the man I will spend the rest of my life with, wherever he is”
I wish my statements here wouldn’t be taken the wrong way, I really admire ladies my age that’s able to sustain a long-time relationship and I am so happy for all of you! But, just thinking of all the possibilities and adventures yet to unfold in my life, it’s just amazing!
Let me share a little story. Back in college it was my conscious decision to not be involved with anyone or even entertain any kind of woo-ing, that was a pact I made with myself, but I’m just a girl and I’ve had my own share of extreme crushes, platonic friendships and ultimate heartaches. Being heartbroken over a relationship that never really existed is the worst! And, I’ve been through all that. I was never and ever will be perfect, but I have embraced these imperfections and just accepted the fact that it is part of life. I have to be hurt every once in a while for me to be stronger, better and much more prepared for whatever life and love throws my way. I would not go into details; instead I will share how I got through it. And, it was never easy; it took time, sleepless night, bucket of tears and ample time of recharging my self-esteem.
Here it goes:
·
First,
acknowledge that what I am trying to get over was never really there. That it
was only me and I should be alright for myself.
·
Second, go
through the pain, but never for too long.
·
Third, go
out with friends and have fun.
·
This may
sound cliché but the fourth step is to continue living. I might’ve gotten a
haircut or something just to have another fresh beginning but other than that,
all I did was, I continued to live. I moved on and nothing feels better than
that J
So, to that guy who I am yet to
meet in my life, I would just want to let you know that I am here still
preparing myself to share my first hello, my first “can we have coffee sometime?”,
my first date, my first ride home, my first love with you J I hope to cross paths with you when I am done
being a girl and are already an independent lady. I will never lose faith of
finding you or you finding me as soon as we both are ready to embark on this
wonderful journey called LOVE.
Make everyday a day filled with
love, life and laughter!
-J (020113/12:27AM)
P.S. May I suggest that you play this song by Jordin Sparks, it's called "Worth the Wait" and be inspired. This has been my anthem since college an it really helped me get through some stuff and a fool-proof feel good song. I am wishing it will do the same to you ;)
P.S. May I suggest that you play this song by Jordin Sparks, it's called "Worth the Wait" and be inspired. This has been my anthem since college an it really helped me get through some stuff and a fool-proof feel good song. I am wishing it will do the same to you ;)
I can totally relate to you pretty much of everything! but i am still in the stage of being hopeless romantic hahaha i try my very best recover from the feelings of despair this gets so hard but reading your story make me feel so much better, it gives me hope. Thank you! :)
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate.
ReplyDeleteI'm 25, not just an nbsb but nssb, too. No suitor since birth. But someone told me that my future husband will be lucky, which is nice. Ps I'm not ugly. I just have this strong personality that turns out to be intimidating.
ReplyDeleteHi! For some guys, having a strong personality is ideal. You just have to wait for him to find you.
DeleteI can totally relate.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!!. You make me feel a lot better! :)
Hi. I can totally relate on you. 2 years had passed after you wrote this, so have you meet your man? just curious here. god bless! :)
ReplyDeletemost of the people say that i'm pretty, chubby but the sexy type of a plus sized woman (around 63 kg 5'4. Walking along the street makes guys amaze. I often received compliments from family and friends. I am also the type of girl that is witty and fun to be with, (not to boast but to give you an overview of the scenario) but i wonder why i got up to this age (23) without having atleast one admirer. I really envy my friends being overdosed with hoity-toity, being courted, being suprised. Now, I am starting to fear, what will happen if no one ever dared to court me. I dont want to be alone, but i dont want to take the first step though.
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate girl!! I wonder what the heck is wrong with me that NOBODY ever attempted to court me or even confess true feelings. Everybody's like experiencing all the love with guys, being admired, the thing in which I can't relate as in. I hate that being just "admirable" is so so hard to attain. How much more being loved? I hate that there's no secret formula to have this thing my heart badly longs to death
DeleteThank you for this. Made me smile knowing that I am not alone int his world who is already in her 20s and still is NBSB. Cheers to us!
ReplyDeleteI'm very proud to all of you girls! :) Ever since I really admire those single ladies who were still NBSB until their mid-20s. It's a gift! A precious gift from God above to those special "princesses of Him" who were resevered for "His special princes" also! :) Don't worry gals! God is really good all the time! He has greater plans restored for us and all we need is to patiently wait for His right time when He would say "Here my Princess, this is the one whom I made especially for you!"
ReplyDeleteI'm a melancholic gal here running 24 and am very proud to say that I'm still NBSB! This is an accomplishment you know!?! and I would like to share three principles or I should say "mantras" that I keep on holding to which maybe could be a good encouragement to others like ME and YOU :)
1: "Ladies, don't chase men. It is not our duties. Be a good woman and God will lead a man to chase you."
2: "Blessed is the man who finds a woman who loves the Lord more than himself; and blessed is the woman whom she was asked by the man from the Lord."
3: "Lucky is the man who gets the FIRST LOVE of a woman; and Lucky is the woman who gets the LAST LOVE of a man."
Can totally relate! Very on point! cheers to us NBSB Ladies! <3 BTW, at this point in time, Have you met him already? :-)
ReplyDeleteLove,
23y/o NBSB
I stumbled across this article because I am in that stage of my life where I started asking, why are they all being in a relationship except me? By the way I just turned 22, no suitor since birth, and what I considered boyfriend years ago was only an online bf but later on I found out that it was a fake person. So I considered myself NBSB for real. I cannot relate about having a relationship with someone in person. I know that I've been improving myself, coz the probable reason why I did not jave somebody courting me is because ImI such an awkward person back in high school and college days. Sometimes I can bear the feeling, but lonely times are as real as these and I just don't know why there aren't someone interested with me knowing that I have the looks, I'm funny, talented and knows how to deal with guys. That's why I can't wait fir the day when someone would confess his feelings. It's not about being nbsb that I hate about, it's about not having someone to admire me. This is very unusual! :(
ReplyDeleteTonight I feel like breaking down. All of my friends are in relationship. People around me kept on asking why am I still single. They are pressuring me and I'm really affected. But after reading this, I somehow realize that I am not alone with this kind of battle. I know God is with all of us.
ReplyDelete